As I reflect and learn from various experiences, certain lessons have become key phrases I’ve used and shared over the years. These lessons come from childhood, working at Hooters as a waitress, from opening businesses around the world, from leading new teams, from making big mistakes, from watching others, from humanitarian work, and from reflecting on those experiences to figure out how I can grow from them. They help me remember and apply the learning - sharing a running list here.
Just because things are good (and could be worse), doesn’t mean you don’t have the right (and sometimes the responsibility) to go for more or work to make them better
FAIL I reframe the traditional definition as an acronym: First Attempt In Learning
I would be failing you if… this is about framing (or reframing) my role and not getting lost in fear of conflict when addressing what could otherwise be a sensitive issue
Be like water - when running over a surface, find the cracks that others might miss - expand in that space and create new paths and opportunities that others view as too small, not worth it, or that they may not see at all
If we don’t, the competition will. That may be ok - but it’s important to remind myself. This is about a fire in the belly, willingness to do what customers and employees are telling you they want or need & understanding the market landscape
…but on the other side of that thought is a countermeasure: “Just because we can do something does not mean we should”. This is about fiduciary responsibility, respect for limited resources, understanding of opportunity costs
Just because we have the right to do something doesn’t mean it’s right to do
The people who are closest to the action know what the right thing to do is long before the leader makes a decision. This is most evident after you finally make a change or decision, and someone says “finally”, “about time” or “what took you so long?”
People who are close to the action often lack two things (that the leader has) 1) the ability to articulate the scaled problem, opportunity or exact solution 2) the authority to do something about it (systemically/at scale)
During periods of high growth - it’s ok for the wheels to shake (and for people to be a bit uncomfortable), but we don’t want them to come off. People should be challenged, but not feeling unsafe. This applies to so many things: hires, communication, culture, leadership, spending, and more
Sometimes the very thing that will save the legacy business is an innovation business. Sometimes (but less often) the thing that hurts the evolution of the legacy business is a distraction (believed to be an innovation) that pulls too many resources away from an unstable core. When launching new channels, products, markets, businesses…know which camp you are in at any given time and resource accordingly
I give myself permission to change and a challenge to continually grow. I support that room to change to all others as well. We are all on a journey
Be obsessed with the experience and needs of customers and employees as it is today. It changes regularly, so I have to keep unlearning, asking and re-asking
If someone criticizes me, I assume first they are (at least partly) correct. That exercise keeps me from putting my foot in my mouth if there is a seed of truth, and if not, allows me to focus on why instead of debating ‘what’
If not me who, if now when? (this served my mom decades ago). It is an often modified and repeated phrase. It actually has roots in an ancient Jewish proverb (if I am not for me, for whom will I be). This question is powerful if seriously asked, answered, and acted on regularly
Check-in regularly in many ways: with yourself and your values, with others who care about you, with your customers and team, with the imagination of what others might do in your scenario
Memories fade and change over time - even the tiniest of details will evolve. Write things down - share your stories with others, keep history as true and unfaded as possible
Many people’s cups runneth over. Bringing grace to a situation will often lead to better outcomes and less stress. (This does not mean that pacifism is a preferred approach)
Help people think through career paths/work journeys in a framework of three buckets: Money, Ego/Optics, Capabilities to put to work and learn. Discuss them in silos, then blend results together to workshop potential paths and decisions
Sometimes anger is a necessary expression and the only way out of a feeling or situation is directly through it - listen, share, learn, evolve, move forward
In the absence of alternative information, people come to their own conclusions (rarely accurate and often not positive). Fill the information vacuum with perspective, empathetic explanations, and detail before they do with inaccurate stories
When you’ve let someone down… a customer, an employee, a family member - make a bigger deal about it than they do, address what is redeemable, and through your actions, leave them with the feeling that you care and will do better
Some people feel the world is out to get them because in some ways it has been - instead of diminishing that or belittling them, prove them wrong with belief, support, and kindness (see chicken wing story in @patrick_oshag ’s podcast)
Some people get bigger when put into more complex situations, others don’t. When you find the ones who do…keep giving them more space and broader challenges. When you find the ones that don’t, help them double down on their specializations.
From time to time I’ll share and archive bursts of lessons and phrases that help me remember and apply those lessons on various platforms like Twitter and LinkedIn. I hope they are as valuable as they have been to me to keep growing, learning, and moving forward.