Most of my posts here are serious - rooted in leadership lessons and navigating choices and changes at home and at work. But like many people, I like being silly once in a while - and I feel like we are in a moment where some silliness connected to an important message will be welcome.
Sometimes, when I listen to people speak to themselves as experts - there is such a lack of humility, and it’s easy to parody. I’ve heard a good bit of that lately. I actually don’t judge it, as there are many reasons people present in such a self-inflated way (even really good humans). They may feel lesser-than in a situation and think they need to walk around with an audible resume to have any respect.
Or maybe they have seen others do it, and are convinced it’s the swagger needed to seem like they belong. It’s possible someone has convinced them they aren’t good enough, and their running-on of self-proclaimed amazingness is a defense mechanism against that feeling. Of course, there are those I call “destructive achievers” - who only feel confident by making others feel lesser-than by comparison and braggadocious behavior. I hope those people learn to be more truly comfortable in their own skin and come to believe that feeling big does not (and should not) come as a result of others feeling small.
I’m all for confidence, and it’s so important we learn to celebrate and speak to our accomplishments in a healthy way, but I prefer to hang with “productive achievers” those who are comfortable in stating what they do, their mistakes, what they’ve learned, and the journey they are on while lifting others up as they grow.
I generally believe humans are magic and capable of far more than they will ever know. In addition, many have the opposite problem - they aren’t bold enough about what they have done, what they want to do, or with sharing their gifts and experiences with the world. But this post is about poking fun at what it can sound like when people are destructive in their boastfulness and how silly it can be. Don’t be that guy/gal/them!
In the spirit of taking the destructive overly-boastful behavior to the extreme, I remembered something someone wrote for me 22 years ago. I was doing some wild random things around the world and thinking pretty highly of myself at the time, and he thought it was funny (hence some of the dated references). I thought it was hilarious back then. This is what it sounds like when some people go on and on and on about themselves and over-inflate their stories.
Get to Know Me:
I am a dynamic figure. Often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I've translated poems for refugees. I write award-winning operas, I manage my time efficiently.
Occasionally, I've treaded water for three days in a row. I woo men with my sensuous and goddess-like trombone playing, I pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, was scouted by the Mets, and am the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
I am an abstract artist, concrete specialist, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swooned over my original line of corduroy evening-wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. One
summer, I toured the continent with a traveling centrifugal force demonstration.
I batted 400.
My deft floral arrangements earn me fame and fortune in international botany circles. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. Once, I read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep it's in a chair. Once, while on vacation in Florida, I successfully negotiated with a group of activists who had seized a small bakery.
The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are paid on time. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago, I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning clams.
I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees in the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis. He is in fact, still alive.
I laugh so hard when I read it - so silly! It reminds me of Kristen Wiig’s SNL character Penelope.
Sorry, not sorry for bringing you to the rabbit hole that is Penelope on YouTube! Ha!!
But seriously, your story IS good enough. Your magic is in your journey and relationships and lessons, not only in the highlights. Remember that for yourself and help others see the magic in their truth and not feel compelled to inflate to compete.
We get bigger by making those around us see how special they are - not by working so hard to convince others and ourselves that we are better or best.
This was downright off the chain hilarious. I know several people like this in fact I know everyone like this yep I know more people like this than you. Lol. Just kidding. Although it maximizes this character defect to the absurd there is a great lesson to be learned: Nobody likes a bragged. As a child my Granny often told us not to boast and that PRIDE COMETH BEFORE THE FALL. I have oftentimes found myself ranting and raving about my own personal accomplishments and in retrospect I sound a bit like Penelope; RIDICULOUS. The way you employ a comedy sketch to deliver an important message speaks to your empathetic and intuitive nature. I am so glad I googled you. I use you as an example of how anyone can achieve Greatness. I am so glad that I walked into that Hooters at Akers Mill in 2009 and that you happened to be there and that you helped me in my volition to get the Hooters girls to be more health and fitness minded. I was the GENERAL MANAGER of that La Fitness and I approached you regarding a corporate sponsorship for all Hooters employees and also I hosted the Biggest Loser contest. You may not remember me Kat Cole, but you really helped me out a great deal, and through your illustrious career and all of these informative blogs you continue to help me. Congratulations on your marriage. What a cool ceremony. Take care
A.D. Taylor.
Humor. Seeing others (and ourselves) as magic. "Get bigger by making those around us see how special they are". You continue to inspire me, Kat! We met at the dinner before you spoke at WorkHuman and I proclaimed YOU should run for President. Still think I might be right...thank you for all you do.